on serving, being afraid and a small update

Oh heavens…it’s 5:30 again and here I sit. Not sure of what to write…my biggest fear of this whole blogging/writing gig…running out of things to say, to write.

Okay…small update on yesterday’s post. The car lives on. Yay for me! Unfortunately, it wasn’t warranty work. Apparently that ‘recent’ work on the water pump was 2 years ago. Goes to show how fast time is flying by I guess. Doug, our mechanic at The Auto Clinic, kept apologizing to me for not being able to do it under warranty. He’s so sweet. He is also one of the best mechanics around, seriously. He is an real mechanic not to be confused with an automobile technician. I believe he can fix just about anything and he’s fair. He is truly one of my super heroes and I tell him that. So thank you to all of you who inquired and wondered. ‘Betsy’ and I are back on the road, at least for now.

Now onto something else…ummmmm.

Tonight I get to eat, and celebrate a well executed women’s conference, at my pastor’s house. I don’t say this to exalt myself, an ‘oh look at me, I get to sup at the pastor’s table’…far from it. The venue for this celebration just happens to be the pastor’s house and not a restaurant. The conference had taken place last month and now it is time to reflect, to celebrate and to pat each leader on the back and say ‘Well done, good and faithful servant”. Time to learn what went well, and what didn’t. Most of all, though, it is to celebrate what the Lord did in those few days. The hearts touched, reached, and forever changed. I had a very small part to play in the discourse of those days, but no matter the size of the role, or the label of the role; the outcome is the same – hearts touched and forever changed by Jesus. This is the true reason we do what we do. No matter what you do or where you serve at church, be it in the nursery, the worship band, at the information desk or shaking hands at the door greeting people, you are impacting people for God.

I love serving in the House of God. I really do. I’ve had a few different hats over the years, from ushering to children’s church to hospitality to ministry team. Sometimes I’ve worn more than one, but there is always, at those times, enough of Gods’ grace to allow you carry more and to carry it well. I have found, in my experience these past 13 years of actively serving, that for me, the multiple hat thing is a harbinger of change. God is wonderfully gentle as He lets you know your season is going to be changing and He’ll transition you. It could be that doing two jobs is easy for a while, a training period if you please, and then one day the fit is a little off and things are a bit harder and you wonder where the ease went. Or, life will change and what was once convenient will suddenly become a lot harder to work into your schedule. These could be signs that God is changing you portfolio. Just a thought.

I’ve had this happen a few times and each time I’ve been transitioned into a new ministry or team, or had something taken off of my plate, there has been a clearly defined “you need to go this way now” moment. Remember, God isn’t a god of confusion. If you’re seriously conflicted about it then maybe it isn’t time. I’m talking confliction, not fear of the unknown; fear of the unknown is a rite of passage, inner conflict isn’t. There’s always going to be a modicum of fear as you step into something new that you’ve never done before, meeting new people, wondering what your responsibilities are going to be…that’s all normal. DON’T let it hold you back. As my venerated pastor says, “Do it afraid”. You’ll be amazed at what’s on the other side of your obedience. Honest.

My latest transition has been from the women’s ministry to the church ministry/prayer team. Am I comfortable with it? Not really, but this is where God is leading me. Oh boy. So not my comfort zone. As a ministry team member I head back to our little ministry lounge/corner at the back of the sanctuary and pray for people who come back there. I can do that. That part’s easy, sort of. The incredibly hard part for me is the part of the service where there is the alter call, this where the pastor at the end of the message asks if there’s anyone who would like to make their lives right with God and make him a part of the lives. Yeah that part. It is at that moment that I have to go to the back of the sanctuary, grab a bible an watch for hands, so far easy, right? That’s not the part I have a hard time with. It’s the going up to anyone who put their hand up, introducing myself, asking if I can pray for them and inviting back to the ministry lounge. THAT is the hard, uncomfortable part for me. I am, by nature, reserved with strangers and very quiet. Don’t laugh, I am. Once we’re in the ministry lounge I’m okay again; it’s that initial ‘cold call’ so to speak that sets my knees to knocking. Do I do it? Yes. Do I enjoy it? Yes & no. But here’s the thing, it’s not about me. Period. It doesn’t matter how I feel; in that moment I am the hands and feet of Christ, and possibly those people’s first contact within the church and there is the potential that I will set the tone for their first steps as a Christian, or for their return to Christ. That’s big stuff.

So I do it, I do it afraid. Knees knocking, a knot in my stomach & fumbling over my words, I do it.

Am I perfect at it? Far from it.

Does my heart pound when a hand goes up? Yup, and not in excitement, there’s still a modicum of fear, even after a year of doing this, and that’s alright.

Who knows what’s on the other side of it?? Definitely not me.

So, I encourage to step into whatever God has for you. Do it. Do it afraid. Doesn’t mean it’s going to be easy or comfortable, but IT IS going to reach far beyond you.

Comments

  1. Glad to hear the car thing worked out ok… I love how you write about transitions and keeping in the centre of what God has for us at a time. Good for you to keep doing it afraid! Praying with and for them (and taking initiative to offer them first) is a HUGE way to impact and bless people!

  2. So loved seeing you last night … xoxo

  3. I also wanted to say: Amazing how the words are there when you show up … So proud of you. Now, to get these here bumcheeks over to my blog and do the same.

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